“That’s Just Who I Am”: When Labels Become Excuses
Last Updated on October 28, 2026 by Stacy Averette
I was a pretty good high school student. Except when it came to math!
For some reason, math just didn’t make sense to me. I struggled through it and had to study harder than I did for my other classes.
“I’m not good at math!”
I still say that sometimes when I reach for my calculator for simple addition.
But here’s what’s interesting.
Years later, when I was homeschooling my children, we tackled algebra and geometry, and we actually had a great time! We had some frustrating moments, but that’s normal when you’re learning something new.
I learned how to make those concepts make sense to me, and that changed how I explained them to my children.
I still wouldn’t call myself a math whiz. But I discovered that struggling with something didn’t mean I couldn’t learn it—or even teach it.
It makes me wonder how often we let the labels we’ve given ourselves (or someone else gave us) determine what we’re willing to do.
When a Description Becomes an Identity
We all have ways of describing ourselves.
“I’m not creative.”
“I’m terrible with technology.”
“I’m not good with money.”
“I’m not a people person.”
“I’m not a leader.”
“I’m just not good at that.”
Sometimes those statements reflect genuine strengths and weaknesses. There’s nothing wrong with knowing what comes naturally to us and what doesn’t.
In fact, self-awareness is an important part of personal growth.
But acknowledging a weakness is different from letting it define who we are.
Sometimes we take one experience, one failure, or one difficult season and draw a conclusion about ourselves that follows us for years.
And before long, we stop questioning it.
We don’t say, “That’s something I struggle with.”
We say, “That’s just who I am.”
And that’s where a label can become a limitation.
Even Moses Had an Excuse
When God called him to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, Moses had several objections.
One of them sounds a lot like the labels we give ourselves.
In Exodus 4:10, Moses tells God that he isn’t eloquent. He describes himself as slow of speech and tongue.
In other words, “I’m not good at talking!”
I’ve wondered where Moses got that idea.
Had someone told him he wasn’t a good speaker? Had he felt embarrassed or struggled to communicate? Was he comparing himself to someone else?
Scripture doesn’t tell us.
And perhaps Moses really did struggle with speaking. We don’t have to assume his assessment was wrong.
But what interests me is how he used that perceived weakness when God called him.
Moses was focused on what he couldn’t do.
God reminded him of who had made his mouth.
“Who has made man’s mouth?” God asks in Exodus 4:11.
Then God tells him to go, promising to be with his mouth and teach him what to say.
Notice that God didn’t tell Moses he was actually a wonderful speaker.
He didn’t deny the difficulty.
Instead, He reminded Moses that his limitations were not the final authority in determining whether he could fulfill the assignment God had given him.
And when Moses continued to resist, God provided Aaron to help him.
Moses’ weakness wasn’t the end of the story.
When Labels Become Excuses
Here’s where I think we need to be honest with ourselves.
Sometimes our labels become convenient excuses.
We say we’re not good at something, so we don’t try.
We say we’re shy, so we avoid reaching out.
We say we’re not disciplined, so we don’t develop better habits.
We say we’re too old, too inexperienced, or too set in our ways to do something different.
And sometimes those statements keep us from taking responsibility for things we could learn, change, or improve.
Of course, not every limitation is an excuse. Some are very real, and wisdom includes recognizing them.
But it’s worth asking whether we’ve confused something that’s difficult with something that’s impossible.
When I was homeschooling, I could have said, “I’m terrible at math. There’s no way I can teach algebra and geometry.”
And I would have missed an opportunity to learn alongside my children and help them understand something that had once been difficult for me.
My struggle with math was real.
But it wasn’t the whole truth about what I was capable of doing.
You Are More Than Your Strengths and Weaknesses
One danger of labeling ourselves is that we start defining our identity too narrowly.
We see ourselves through the lens of our abilities, accomplishments, failures, personality, or past experiences.
But none of those things tell the whole story.
Ephesians 2:10 reminds us that we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works that God prepared beforehand for us to walk in.
Our identity begins with what God has done for us in Christ, not with what we’re naturally good at or what we’ve struggled to accomplish.
As we grow, we keep discovering how God has shaped us through our experiences, relationships, challenges, and opportunities.
What once seemed like weaknesses may become useful in ways we never expected.
I think about how my own difficulty understanding math eventually shaped how I taught it.
I knew what it felt like to be confused. I knew what explanations hadn’t worked for me. And I had learned to approach the material differently.
Something I’d once considered a weakness became part of what helped me teach.
That doesn’t mean every weakness will become a strength. But it does remind me that our understanding of ourselves is often incomplete.
We’re still learning. Still growing. Still being shaped by God.
Is That Really Who You Are?
Maybe it’s time to pay attention to the things you routinely say about yourself.
Not because you need to become good at everything. You don’t.
And not because you can overcome every limitation with enough effort.
But because how you describe yourself can shape the opportunities you pursue, the responsibilities you accept, and your willingness to grow.
So here’s something to consider:
What have you been saying about yourself for so long that you’ve stopped questioning whether it’s the whole truth?
Is it an honest description of a weakness?
Or has it become an excuse?
Has it helped you understand yourself better?
Or has it kept you from discovering something else about the person God created you to be?
You don’t have to deny your weaknesses or pretend to be someone you’re not.
But you don’t have to let one weakness, one failure, or one old description define your entire identity either.
Knowing who you are means recognizing your strengths and weaknesses while remembering that neither determines your worth or the whole of what God may call you to do.
